Have you ever found yourself getting really frustrated with the way people conduct themselves, handle issues, react to situations, or respond to you? Every time you see them, interact with them, or even feel their presence in a room, your hairs stand up and your blood starts to boil. You probably find yourself asking,” Why does this person frustrate me so much? Why do they get to me, and why am I letting them get to me?” Are you ready to hear the answer and embark on a journey of self-discovery and potentially learn things about yourself that you don’t want to know?  

Life is a mirror and often times what we see is a reflection of how we perceive them and who we are. This includes how we interpret the events of an evening, who/what we see as the cause of a fight, and who we understand to be the winner of a debate. Our opinions, views, and beliefs stem from our previous experience (traumas and successes). If going to a certain place gives you anxiety, then every association you make with that place will lead you to the same feeling of anxiety. The same goes for how you interpret the cause and effects of things around you.   

Getting back to the topic, how does this correlate with people irritating you? Well, what irritates you in others is often the exact same weakness or flaw which you posses. If this doesn’t sound remotely accurate or possible, just remember the last time someone was acting like a know-it-all, being bossy, dominant, or perhaps timid. Is it possible that you have a bit of that same quality in you? Have you ever gotten frustrated at yourself for not speaking your mind and then you run into someone who is constantly afraid of what people will think or say that they hide their feelings and thoughts and potentially get taken advantage of? 

Although each person has unique strengths, weaknesses, and natural tendencies, we can all improve who we are and how we interact with one another. Therefore, given this information, these tools are provided for us to learn about ourselves and improve. Can you imagine how much better the world would be if we each corrected just one irritating quality that we posses? How much better would you feel about yourself if you were able to refrain from swearing and cursing, and speak more articulately? How differently would you be perceived and how would that affect your environment? The next time you get frustrated by someone's behavior or feel uncomfortable in a certain situation, take a moment to look within yourself and the solution may be closer that you realized.

We are all familiar with the glass half full and half empty perspective on life. What causes us to believe in the positive outlook versus the negative outlook? Are we born with a gene that automatically triggers us to be an eternal optimist or pessimist? The question is, if having a positive perspective on life can reduce blood pressure, keep us young and healthy, and overall improve our life, then why do so many people view life and its challenges with such a negative outlook?

We all want to be happy, achieve our goals, and enjoy the journey. I can’t help but see the world and people around us doing the exact opposite. Totally torturing themselves with feelings of lack, sadness, and disregard for the wonderful things they have and achieved over the years. It’s so easy to get caught up in the daily grind, the unimportant issues or events that take place which affect our overall demeanor. For example, driving down the road and getting cut off. SO WHAT?!?!?! Are you really going to allow this to effect your day, your mood, or even a second of your life? Is it worth the stress?

Losing a job is an “ego crushing” event that many people struggle with. It’s completely understandable to experience a sense of failure, get down on yourself, and inevitably feel worthless and stressed out! Especially since everyone needs a roof over their head and food to eat and without a job, both can be a challenging. However, how is feeling down on yourself helping to secure a new position? Are you more marketable and appealing to potential employers when your tail is between your legs or when your head is held high and you’re feeling on top of the world? How do you change your perspective? My suggestion is this: Make a list of all your attributes, everything you have to offer a future employer. Then look at your last position and see why you weren’t a fit for them and why, most importantly, they aren’t a fit for you! Allow that list to energize you and help you realize that they aren’t good enough for you, not the reverse.

The reality is simple, our perspective governs our life! Choosing your attitude and outlook can change how you perceive the events in your life and the ways in which solutions will arise. Life will always throw us lemons and it’s our job to make lemonade.