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1/25/2013 0 Comments

Self Esteem

High self esteem allows for healthy relationships, effective communication, personal and professional growth (due to the high value placed on development and belief in one’s self), and positive societal behavior (treating others with respect). What happens when an individual has low self esteem? How does it manifest and appear to the outside world? Often the lack of self worth manifests as a doormat where the person allows themselves to be taken advantage of and never taking a stand. Others are constantly involved in conflict because they feel attacked and need to protect themselves, therefore appearing very defensive. Another possibility is having a very high ego to counteract the lack of self worth which manifests as arrogance or over confidence. Are there benefits in having a low self image? Although it’s clear that having high self esteem allows individuals to further in their careers and personal lives more efficiently, challenges arise(including recession and unemployment) which immediately contribute to changes in self image. Here are some suggestions on how to work through what’s blocking you, followed by ways to focus on your strengths to help overcome these obstacles.

Need to:
1.    Understand exactly why you’re feeling low, where did it come from? What specifically is getting you down?
2.    When things don't go your way, don’t automatically label the situation as negative. Ask the question: What is the positive in this? What lesson can I learn from this experience?
3.    Understand the harm that’s being caused from the destructive feelings… Create a support system to share your concerns and then map out the potential solutions.
4.    Find effective ways to be aware of these negative situations in the future, see the lesson and create a plan of action.

8 tips to build your self esteem:
1. What makes you feel proud? What are your achievements? Write them down when you’re feeling good about yourself, when you’ve just finished a very productive day or when you’ve achieved a goal and feel accomplished.
2. Do a SWOT analysis- Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities (options including activities, job opportunities, contacts), Threats (people and things getting in your way of accomplishing your high self worth).
3. Associate with positive, self confident individuals, they will rub off on you and also show you the light in every dark situation.
4. Ask for feedback, be vulnerable and open to change.
5. Plan ahead. Self-confidence comes from being prepared and aware.
6. Take action. High self esteem comes from taking action and putting things into motion, just thinking about it doesn’t do anything. Break down your challenges and start working through them one step at a time.
7. Role-play and rehearse for success-  To handle conflict, confrontation, reprimanding an employee, job interview, negotiating a raise, or making a presentation, it’s so much easier once you’ve practiced it.
8. Celebrate your success and share with others.
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9/12/2008 0 Comments

Perspective

We are all familiar with the glass half full and half empty perspective on life. What causes us to believe in the positive outlook versus the negative outlook? Are we born with a gene that automatically triggers us to be an eternal optimist or pessimist? The question is, if having a positive perspective on life can reduce blood pressure, keep us young and healthy, and overall improve our life, then why do so many people view life and its challenges with such a negative outlook?

We all want to be happy, achieve our goals, and enjoy the journey. I can’t help but see the world and people around us doing the exact opposite. Totally torturing themselves with feelings of lack, sadness, and disregard for the wonderful things they have and achieved over the years. It’s so easy to get caught up in the daily grind, the unimportant issues or events that take place which affect our overall demeanor. For example, driving down the road and getting cut off. SO WHAT?!?!?! Are you really going to allow this to effect your day, your mood, or even a second of your life? Is it worth the stress?


Losing a job is an “ego crushing” event that many people struggle with. It’s completely understandable to experience a sense of failure, get down on yourself, and inevitably feel worthless and stressed out! Especially since everyone needs a roof over their head and food to eat and without a job, both can be a challenging. However, how is feeling down on yourself helping to secure a new position? Are you more marketable and appealing to potential employers when your tail is between your legs or when your head is held high and you’re feeling on top of the world? How do you change your perspective? My suggestion is this: Make a list of all your attributes, everything you have to offer a future employer. Then look at your last position and see why you weren’t a fit for them and why, most importantly, they aren’t a fit for you! Allow that list to energize you and help you realize that they aren’t good enough for you, not the reverse.

The reality is simple, our perspective governs our life! Choosing your attitude and outlook can change how you perceive the events in your life and the ways in which solutions will arise. Life will always throw us lemons and it’s our job to make lemonade.


 

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